Man Flees Mouse

Years ago, living in a small apartment with zero closet space and a huge kitchen with zero counter space, I acquired a number of non-rent-paying roomies. It's funny. I'd always thought that mice, in a cage nibbling on a piece of carrot, were really cute.

They tend to become less adorable when they're sharing your pillow and pulling at your hair. Not my personal preference for an alternative wake-up alarm, especially since the little critter had been crawling around in the wall with the fiberglass insulation. I spent days trying to get the fiberglass out of my arm and the side of my face.

An urgent call to my landlord garnered me very, as it turned out, useless advice - "Get a cat!" The little black fur-ball with the angry gold eyes had only one phobia. He was terrified of mice! Just the sound of scratching under the sink would send him flying in the opposite direction.

Briefly, I went the mousetrap route. Yecchh!! You've not lived until you've heard that 'snap' and 'squeak' at 3:00AM. Trust me - it is not conducive to sleep or peace of mind!

At a friend's suggestion, I crammed steel wool in every gap, around every pipe in my kitchen - to no avail. (Probably, given my luck, just trapped them all in the apartment.) After spending an entire summer (without air conditioning) sleeping with the oven and burners on high to discourage my 'roomies' from wandering in, and watching my feline protector cower in a corner or cry to go outside - I moved.






Don't forget to visit JMark Afghans and My Gallery at Zazzle

We also have a page on Squidoo that supports the Genocide Intervention Network.

Be sure to Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers

We look forward to seeing you online.

God Bless!

Jules

"The Mist" by Stephen King

I have been a Stephen King fan since Carrie scared the daylights out of me. High school wasn't all that kind to me and my mother was, in my opinion, a bit rigid. You can imagine how much I, for just a moment, really wanted those powers.

Despite that, I'd have to say that, out of all of the movies and series I've seen, "The Langoliers" is my favorite Stephen King story. During an ordinary cross-country flight from LA to Boston, several passengers wake to find that virtually all of their fellow passengers have disappeared. One of the people still on board is a pilot, who takes control of the plane. As time passes, they are unable to reach anyone or any city over which they fly, including military bases.

After diverting the flight to Bangor, Maine which has less traffic than Boston, the passengers realize that not only did their fellow passengers disappear - so did everyone everywhere else. The Bangor airport is a ghost town. But stranger yet, none of the ordinary items in the snack bar are real. There is no carbonation in the soda or beer, the sandwiches have no flavor, and the matches won't light. As the situation becomes more and more bizarre, one of the passengers slowly descends into madness - convinced that every approaching sound is the Langoliers, coming to kill him.

There is simply no way to sit back and calmly watch the creatures coming at the plane as it sits stranded on the tarmac. Every fiber of your being is wrapped up in the fate of the awakened passengers and one very frightened madman. An ordinary flight with extraordinary outcomes.

Today, I was watching the movie trailers for The Mist. Once again, a group of diverse people are brought together by an ordinary situation. Except this situation was imagined by Stephen King, so it quickly becomes unnatural, extraordinary, and terrifying.

Be sure to check out the trailers on the movie website. Then, get ready for another unforgettable and intensely unnerving experience - The Mist by Stephen King.







Don't forget to visit JMark Afghans and My Gallery at Zazzle

We also have a page on Squidoo that supports the Genocide Intervention Network.

Be sure to Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers

We look forward to seeing you online.

God Bless!

Jules

The Case of the Amputated Leg, Part II

Remember the post I did a while back about the man who had kept his amputated left leg in a BBQ smoker, planning to have it cremated with the rest of him when he died? If so, then you'll also remember that he couldn't pay his bill, so the storage company sold the contents of his storage unit - smoker, leg, and all. The new owner of the smoker and leg, refused to return the leg, so the two men decided to take it to court - TVs Judge Greg Mathis, to be specific.

I had completely forgotten about the story until I ran across an update today. Not surprisingly, the judge awarded custody of the leg to the original owner - pardon the pun. But he also ordered reimbursement, in the amount of $5,000.00, to the man who had purchased the contents of the storage unit.

All in all, a rather macabre and disgusting case.






Don't forget to visit JMark Afghans and My Gallery at Zazzle

We also have a page on Squidoo that supports the Genocide Intervention Network.

Be sure to Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers

We look forward to seeing you online.

God Bless!

Jules

And Just How DID She Fracture That Knee?

I couldn't sleep last night, partially because I slept until after 10:00am yesterday morning and partially because my knee was screaming at me. So, I had plenty of time to think about how - exactly - I managed to twist my leg so that the kneecap ended up on the outside of the leg. The basic laws of physics will tell you "It just cain't happen!" (Didn't know that the laws of physics are very poor grammarians, did you?)

After giving it careful thought, I think I've figured out what stupid thing I did to mangle the snot out of my knee. Because I've done it before (to my right knee), I assumed that the top of my leg went one way and the bottom went the other, painfully wrenching the connective tissue surrounding my poor knee. Unfortunately, the last time I did that, my kneecap (although seriously swollen and angry for several weeks) didn't move 90 degrees out of position. There had to be another answer.

Visit our Partner in Shopping:
With Halloween right around the corner, why not try some of the amazing treats from

Black Hound NY

Here are the known facts:

• I was taking out a load of trash that was waaay too heavy for me to carry, so I dragged it through the parking lot to the dumpster;
• I couldn't lift the trash to throw it in the dumpster, so I started swinging it back and forth hoping to get it high enough to swing over the edge and into the dumpster;
• With one terrific push, I planted my left leg and swung the load of trash with all of my strength;
• Suddenly, I was on my behind on the pavement in front of the dumpster, next to my trash (it could have at least gone in!);
• I automatically grabbed my knee, as that was the location of the screaming pain - you wouldn't believe how much that hurts, by the way;
• I found my kneecap was now located on the outside of my leg and, in a moment of temporary insanity, placed the heel of my hand under the kneecap and shoved it back onto the top of my leg;
• Amazingly, I didn't pass out, although I did break out into a vicious sweat and saw the prettiest little stars!

Now, with the facts in hand, have you come to the same conclusion that I finally have - the one that Mark instantaneously reached, although he didn't bother to clue me in?

The only thing that makes any sense, as I was swinging the trash from right to left (the same direction my kneecap went), is that during that last swing - on the way to the dumpster - I slammed the load of trash, with all of my strength and all of its weight, straight into my knee.

I have, admittedly, done some pretty lame-brained things in my life. For all intents and purposes, I think this one will stay at the top of that list for a very, very long time. In fact, it is my fervent hope that I never, ever manage to 'improve' on it. Know what I mean?






Don't forget to visit JMark Afghans and My Gallery at Zazzle

We also have a page on Squidoo that supports the Genocide Intervention Network.

Be sure to Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers

We look forward to seeing you online.

God Bless!

Jules

Breast-rubbing Dentist

Okay, now I've heard it all. This dentist, who is up on charges for fondling the breasts of 27 female patients, claims that 'pectoral massages' are standard treatment for temporomandibular joint (TMJ) disorder. Having suffered from TMJ disorder, I didn't really buy that explanation, so I went surfing for more information.

So far, the best I could find regarding massages and TMJ dealt with relaxing the joints - which reside in front of the ear on either side of the face. Frankly, I think this guy is a quack and a pervert. It doesn't matter to me that he needs to continue seeing patients to support 7 kids and pay for his defense.

Take his license and let him serve fries at the local burger joint. He has no business dealing with patients.

Don't forget to visit JMark Afghans and My Gallery at Zazzle

We also have a page on Squidoo that supports the Genocide Intervention Network.

Now you can, Vote For JMark Afghans, etc. at Independent Designers


We look forward to seeing you online.

God Bless!

Jules

The Case of the Amputated Leg

As long as people walk this earth, there will be 'odd news' to read. And, of course, the minute you think you've heard it all, something even stranger will come along to make you shake your head. Such is the story of the amputated leg.

Following a plane crash that killed his father, a gentleman was forced to have one of his legs amputated above the knee. In a decision that boggles my mind, he decided to keep the leg, so that he could have it cremated with the rest of him when he died. Over the last 3 years, he has stored it in a variety of places, including inside a barbecue smoker that he had kept in a mini-storage unit.

When he fell on hard times and couldn't pay his bill, the storage company auctioned off the contents of his unit - including the barbecue smoker. The new owner, upon opening the smoker, found the wrapped leg. At first he thought it was a piece of driftwood, but when it oozed fluid onto his hand, he freaked out, called 911, and surrendered the leg to authorities.

Now, both men want the leg back. So much so, they have agreed to fly to Chicago and have Judge Mathis adjudicate the case on national TV. It certainly takes all kinds to make a world, doesn't it?

Don't forget to visit JMark Afghans and My Gallery at Zazzle

We also have a page on Squidoo that supports the Genocide Intervention Network.


We look forward to seeing you online.

God Bless!

Jules