Don't get me wrong. I love my glasses. (Well, except when I look in the mirror; then, I hate them.) I can see the TV from across the room, and even read street signs. I can read the fine print on the cereal box and even thread a needle. It's great; really.

It's just that I can't - at a comfortable distance - see the screen on my laptop clearly. The top of the bifocals focuses a little too far away; the bottom, a little too close. Meaning I either increase the length of my already-so-long-I-bump-into-everything arms or I have a joint inserted in the middle of my forearm, cuz right now I don't bend that way.

I do have a third option - contacts and readers. The combination works. I can clearly read the print on the monitor without balancing the laptop on my shins or bumping my nose on the screen. But, somehow, putting in contacts and putting on glasses feels a bit like putting lifts in high heels - redundant and ridiculous.

The real kicker? The contacts and readers I had - before I spent a king's ransom on new stuff - managed to do about as well as this new stuff for computer work. Thereby invoking the no-good-deed-goes-unpunished portion of today's entertainment.

But, since I have about 10 hours worth of work to do and no surgeon in sight, I guess I'd best go put the ol' contacts in. {sigh}