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'A Christmas Story'
Everyone has their favorite Christmas-season movie -
It's a Wonderful Life,
Miracle on 34th Street, some versions of
A Christmas Carol, and
White Christmas. Not to mention, the
animated stories of Rudolph, the Grinch, and Charlie Brown that I've been watching since I was almost as small as the Peanuts gang.
At our house, we watch all of those (most years). But we have a couple that we - traditionally -
have to see or it just isn't Christmas.
One of my must-see movies is
Scrooged the manic remake of 'A Christmas Carol' starring Bill Murray and a cast of dozens. It's funny and, at the end, always makes me a little
verklempt. If you haven't seen it - I won't spoil the ending. Suffice it to say that their take on 'Tiny Tim' always gets to me.
Now, Mark likes most of these movies. But his must-see is
A Christmas Story. When I say must-see, I mean
MUST-SEE!
We missed it one year and the holidays just weren't the same. I've gotta find a copy of that movie - this year!
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God Bless!
Jules
You Want Me to What?!
Okay, you've just gotta love this:
Polar bear mating doomed by gender mix-up!
Zoo handlers in Northern Japan brought in a 'friend' to mate with their female polar bear. The two animals got along well, but the zookeepers started to notice some odd similarities.
After two DNA tests and a physical exam . . . oops! Apparently, although determined to be a male from the age of three months, Tsuyoshi just wasn't going to be
that-kind-of-friend, after all.
Note to zookeepers: might wanna check these things out - early?!
Don't forget to visit
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We also have a page on
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Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
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at Independent Designers
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God Bless!
Jules
Stop! It Hurts!
I am a sucker for a funny story. What can I say? I love to laugh. Not a little laugh, either. I need, on a regular basis, one of those
tears-rolling-down-your-cheeks,
gonna-wet-my-pants belly laughs.
Today, I found
Peter McKay and I haven't stopped laughing since. Okay . . . maybe while I was trying to catch my breath about 20 minutes ago. But that's it!
It's the little, commonplace occurrences in our lives that are the most aggravating. Waiting - anywhere - in line; the moron - in front of us - who waits until the light's turning red to make that left turn; telephone customer service reps - for the most part - who don't think and don't care. You get the idea.
However, if you turn your head to the side a little - gain a different vantage point - there's humor to be found in almost anything. (Well, anything where you have no major bleeding or loss of body parts.) I'm not above a little slapstick, either; like watching the cat try to turn and run on the newly waxed floors. Never fails to make me giggle.
I highly recommend
"Odor In The House" and
"For Whom The Bell Tolls". In fact, I'm going to go read them again!
Just as soon as I go to the bathroom.
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
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at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Curb Chocolate Cravings
I saw this headline:
Brisk Walk Can Curb Chocolate Cravings today and my first thought was "Heaven Forbid!" A brisk walk - yuck!
Honestly, I don't eat chocolate (or any sweets) on a regular basis. It's a habit I developed years ago when I was having serious problems with my blood sugar levels. My pancreas works a bit too well and overcompensates for sugary foods. But brisk walks? Maybe for nicotine cravings, although . . .
First, I'd have to take a shower, which generally involves a 3 hour wait for hot water and a mad scramble to finish before the warm water does. This exercise in frustration is followed by 40 minutes detangling my hair, 30 minutes lotioning 6 feet of arms and legs, and . . .
aw hell! I just lit a cigarette!
Then, I have to dig through the closet to find something to wear - something that's clean (eliminate 50% of the closet), that fits (there goes another 40%), that suits the weather (kiss 8% goodbye). Now . . .
aw hell! I just lit a cigarette!
See? Brisk walks are just a bad idea! And I haven't even found my shoes, yet.
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
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at Independent Designers
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God Bless!
Jules
Sore Feet!
Messaged
the Chef this morning. The job is good, but his feet are
really sore! I can remember those days.
I thought I'd died and gone to heaven when I got my first office job. Wouldn't be spending 8+ hours on my feet anymore. It was just wonderful!
The worst (on my feet) job I had in my youth was at the cheese shop at the local mall. Vanity had me in heels; but the shop had a cement floor behind the counter, for health reasons. I don't think my feet
ever hurt as badly as they did after all day standing on that floor. The steakhouse had a concrete floor, too. But I wore more sensible shoes in those days.
So, I'm sure that he's spending his entire shift on the same type of floor. If nothing else, I know what to get him for Christmas . . .
Air pillow insoles and a foot massager!
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Now this is relaxed!
Paka - Felis concatnip
Liver treats, schliver treats. Gimme da green stuff!
Living proof that catnip is a great de-stresser!
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Eclipse II - The Sequel
Just the other day, we lost cable and Internet service. Coincidentally, at the same time as the eclipse. It wasn't out for that long, but it did show me just how dependent we are on our electronic services.
Talk about withdrawal! I thought I was going to go nuts. No TV I can (sorta) live with, but don't take my TV
and my Internet! I get itchy and twitchy if I can't surf.
Well, that outage was - seriously - nothing! Last night, 30 minutes before the end of the
Doctor Who Season 4 finale, everything went down again!
Do you remember a howling scream about 9:30pm GMT -7:00 last night? The sound of a wounded animal, crying out in agony? That was me!
At first I was calm. "Just a fluke. It'll be back shortly." I strolled into the other room to have a cigarette, not worried. It was no biggie - certainly we wouldn't lose the cable for the entire remainder of the show. Just couldn't happen.
After 30 minutes of downtime - panic set in! My heart started racing; my hands started to shake! "OMG, OMG, OMG! What do I do?! What do I do?! What do I do?!" Normally, I would edit or blog - but I was cut off from the rest of the world!
And, just to make matters worse - it was still out when I got up today!
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
George Carlin, We'll Miss You!
An amazing and fascinating mind, George Carlin will be sorely missed by those of us who prefer our comedy intellectual and honest.
This video ~ "Life is Worth Losing" ~ is from August 2006.
Contains Explicit Language
Please visit
georgecarlin.com for more of George, by George himself.
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Python in Toilet
I was reading this
news story and just couldn't believe my eyes!
Imagine lifting the toilet seat and having a nearly 6' long snake staring up at you. Well, apparently, that's what residents of a high-rise apartment building in Darwin, Australia were experiencing. The man who captured the python felt that the runaway pet had been wandering through the building's sewer system. Judging by the reported smell, he must have been right.
My question is: How, exactly, does one pull a 1.8 meter snake out of the toilet?
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Environmental Phase Out
Bush to Phase Out Environment by 2009 This 'article' is posted in the Humor section of Yahoo!News. As with all good humor, there is a grain (in this case a silo-full) of truth running through it.
Species after species, habitat after habitat, this administration has acted in the worst interests of the country and the planet. It's easy to tell from where Bush and Cheney come. Big business and the oil industry, in particular, have their full support and concern.
Who needs clean air and water? Apparently, not Americans or the rest of the world, since the administration refuses to sign Kyoto. What value are animals that can't be found in the meat department of the local supermarket? Obviously no value, especially if their natural habitat happens to exist within 5 miles of 5 gallons of oil.
They are good little autocrats who deserve the disdain of all Americans. The world already sees them for the fools that they are.
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at ZazzleWe also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
Be sure to
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent DesignersWe look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Give Me Strength!
Did you ever have one of those days where you throw up your arms, turn your face to the sky/ceiling/heavens and cry
Give Me Strength!? If not, I want your life! Otherwise, you know what I'm talking about.
You are faced with or being bombarded by situations that are just too much. It's not that they - individually - are that difficult. Not at all. The problem is, they've all been waiting in the wings, chatting amongst themselves, and biding their time until your guard was down. Then
all of the insanity jumps out at you - at the same time.
Or maybe you've had a situation here and a situation there that has weakened your immunity to craziness. You aren't really poised over the sanity precipice, waiting to fall into the dementia abyss; you're just a little stressed. Suddenly, several crazy happenings appear out of nowhere, waving their arms, screaming wildly, and charging directly at you and you realize the only direction you can go is . . . over the edge.
Welcome to My Life! Not just today or this week, month, or year - but for
nearly 5 years! I actually counted - in 61 days, my grip on sanity will have been attacked, sometimes from several directions at the same time, for 1,825 days.
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at ZazzleWe also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
Be sure to
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent DesignersWe look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Man Flees Mouse
Years ago, living in a small apartment with
zero closet space and a huge kitchen with
zero counter space, I acquired a number of non-rent-paying roomies. It's funny. I'd always thought that mice, in a cage nibbling on a piece of carrot, were really cute.
They tend to become less adorable when they're sharing your pillow and pulling at your hair. Not my personal preference for an alternative wake-up alarm, especially since the little critter had been crawling around in the wall with the fiberglass insulation. I spent days trying to get the fiberglass out of my arm and the side of my face.
An urgent call to my landlord garnered me
very, as it turned out, useless advice - "Get a cat!" The little black fur-ball with the angry gold eyes had only one phobia. He was terrified of mice! Just the sound of scratching under the sink would send him flying in the opposite direction.
Briefly, I went the mousetrap route. Yecchh!! You've not lived until you've heard that
'snap' and
'squeak' at 3:00AM. Trust me - it is not conducive to sleep or peace of mind!
At a friend's suggestion, I crammed steel wool in every gap, around every pipe in my kitchen - to no avail. (Probably, given my luck, just trapped them all in the apartment.) After spending an entire summer (without air conditioning) sleeping with the oven and burners on high to discourage my 'roomies' from wandering in, and watching my feline protector cower in a corner or cry to go outside - I moved.
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at ZazzleWe also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
Be sure to
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent DesignersWe look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
Don't forget to visit
JMark Afghans and
My Gallery at Zazzle
We also have a page on
Squidoo that supports the
Genocide Intervention Network.
You can cast your
Vote For JMark Afghans, etc.
at Independent Designers
We look forward to seeing you online.
God Bless!
Jules
